Having It A.L.L.

Welcome to Having It A.L.L., the podcast that flips the script on what it means to “have it all” in life. I’m Matthew Bivens, your host and friend, and I’m inviting you to join me in conversations designed to help you radically shift your confidence, self worth, and clarity. In order to create new results in your life - whether that’s in your relationships, your health, your money, your family or your life’s purpose - you must make new decisions and build new habits. This podcast will not only deliver the lessons and action items that will help you move the needle in your life, but also share the vulnerable and honest truth about the challenges of working to improve and ultimately master yourself. Each breakdown can lead to breakthrough, and we cover it all on this podcast. Personal development is not an easy road, but you can create meaningful change that lasts. Let’s do it together one choice at a time. Tune in each week and see that it’s not only possible to have it all, but that you were meant to all along! 

Self-Improvement
Mental Health
Alternative Health
101
Why I Embrace P.A.I.N. (And Why It's Important ...
When pain hits you, do you lean into it or run from it? I used to be the person that ran from pain. Any type of pain, from physical to emotional, I wanted nothing to do with it! And it made perfect sense to me: pain did not feel good, and so why would I want to experience something that didn't feel good? Today I have an entirely different perspective towards PAIN. In fact, I embrace and love pain today, and doing so has been a critical step in my personal growth and healing journey. Tune in as I give you a new way to look at PAIN and show you why leaning into pain will free you from your fears.
38 min
102
Codependency: The Silent Killer Of Your Self-Wo...
What is codependency? As you read that question above, you probably have an idea of what codependency is in your mind. Most people can spot signs of codependent behavior when they see it in others, but fail to notice it in their own lives. The truth about codependency is that it's much more prevalent, damaging and insidious than you might imagine, and in fact it's at the root of many of the biggest challenges that people face day-to-day.
26 min
103
QUICK FIX: Learn To Love Life's Hardships (HIA ...
In today's Quick Fix I let you know why you need to learn to love and get excited about life's hardships
6 min
104
Now Is NOT The Time To Be Slacking On Your Exer...
Have you given yourself permission to slack on your exercise and overall physical health? In today's conversation I'm illuminating the 5 key areas of your health - physical, emotional, mental, spiritual and social - and I'm showing you how they are all connected. Now is not the time to take your foot off the health gas. Especially if you're afraid for your physical health, now is the time to do MORE exercising, MORE clean eating and MORE healthy social connecting.
50 min
105
The Morning And Nighttime Routines That Help Me...
How intentional are you with the way you start and end your day? Here's the truth, there are people out there living incredibly fulfilling lives, they HAVE IT ALL, the Big S Success, and you can bet that it's not by accident. The way you start your day and the way you end your day have a HUGE impact on not only what happens during the course of your day, but also how you feel about yourself and your life. A winning morning and nighttime routine doesn't have to be long and complicated and rigid, but it does need to be intentional. In today's episode I share with you the very specific habits and routines I use in the morning and evening to set myself up for success each day.
43 min
106
The Key To Living A Life Of Purpose And Meaning
Do you feel your life lacks purpose and meaning? On today's episode I'm sharing with you the key to living a life of purpose and meaning, and I'm revealing why so many people struggle in this area DESPITE having a strong desire to create a life they love living.
31 min
107
When Asking For Help Is Hard - A Simple Way To ...
Do you struggle with asking for help or accepting help when it's offered to you? For me, asking for help has been a challenge since I was young. I don't really know when I started to feel like I needed to take care of things on my own, but that belief follows me to this day. In this episode I'm sharing with you a few common examples of when the universe places people or things in our path that are there to help us.
12 min
108
Achieve Your Highest Dreams By Looking At Your ...
What if the path to achieving your highest dreams wasn't in the clarity of your vision, but in the standards you hold for yourself? Todays episode explores the idea that, "We become our lowest standard, not our highest dream." I unpack this statement and give you action steps for raising your standards so that you can have it all!
33 min
109
Why You're Failing to Tap Into Your Full Creati...
“We are all creators. Whether or not we create is not up to us. We are human, and creating is what we do.” - Michael Gungor. Today’s episode is an exercise in creation. I followed the advice of a friend and fellow podcaster, and recorded this episode with no notes and no script. Every part of this episode was created organically, on the spot.
42 min
110
What Is Your Joy-to-Sadness Ratio? (HIA Classic)
If you looked at your average day, how much of it do you spend in a state of Joy vs Sadness? My coach and mentor Day Adeogba shared with me a conversation he had with his kids recently, where he asked them "What do you think your Joy-to-Sadness ratio is?" That idea of a Joy-to-Sadness ratio totally fascinated me, and inspired me to think about it for myself....which of course led to this podcast episode! Tune in to hear about the Joy-to-Sadness ratio, how you can determine your goal Joy-to-Sadness ratio, and what you can do to experience the amount of Joy you desire in life.
30 min
111
7 Self Love Practices I Do Everyday (And 3 I St...
How do you practice self love on a daily basis? In today's episode I'm sharing with you 7 ways that I practice self love every single day. I'm breaking down the simple habits and practices that keep my tank full and provide a spark in my life. And I'm also sharing with you 3 habits that I STOPPED doing because they didn't support or honor me.
41 min
112
Change Your Life Series: Why Is Change So Frust...
Why is change so frustrating? You'd think it wouldn't be so difficult to change something that you REALLY want to change. I know in the past I've been incredibly hard on myself for "not having the willpower" or "not wanting it enough" or "not being disciplined enough", when I failed to make change happen in my life. But what I told you there were crucial pieces of the change equation that you were missing? Ones that illuminate why change is so hard, and how to actually make it work for you.
36 min
113
Let's Talk About Sex: Understanding Your Sexual...
What is your sexual story? We all have a sexual story that was started when we were young and is being added to constantly. Many people's stories around sex are based in shame, judgement, embarrassment and expectation. That leads to sexual experiences and feelings that are unhealthy and certainly don't uplift and heal.But it doesn't have to be that way! You can rewrite your sexual story, heal those sexual wounds you carry, and create an entirely new sexual experience for yourself that's based in love, feels authentic, and full of genuine connection. Today I'm kicking off a series about sex which will help you transform your views on sex, from the inside out.
37 min
114
The Balance Between Being A Leader And A Follow...
Are you more of a leader or a follower? You might think that one of these roles is better or more preferred than the other. However, the truth is that it's your ability to balance between the two that will lead to your greatest success, and your goal is to understand your leadership-to-followership ratio.
37 min
115
What Does It Really Mean To Be An "Involved Dad...
How would you describe what being an "involved dad" is? And, if you're a father, would you currently consider yourself an "involved dad"? This idea came up in a conversation Sarah and I were having on our other podcast, Doing It At Home, and I was clear that discussing fatherhood and what it looks like to show up powerfully as a dad was something to bring to Having It A.L.L.. Join me as I dive into what it really means to be an "involved dad" and why that label itself carries with it some controversy.
53 min
116
Doomscrolling: What It Is, Why You Need To Know...
Have you ever found yourself up late at night, scrolling through social media, feeling worse and worse with every thumb flick, but unable to break away? That my friend is known as "doomscrolling" and it's robbing you of your happiness, peace and mental health. In today's episode I talk about Doomscrolling, break down why we do it, and give you some expert advice on how you can break the cycle and reclaim your health!
62 min
117
NOW Is The Time To Start Prioritizing Your Heal...
Where does your personal health rank on your list of priorities? Probably not at the top. Well, as you can guess from this title of this episode, I'm making a strong case for why you MUST begin to push your health to the top of your list. And I'm talking right now! Not next month, next quarter, over the summer. NOW!
44 min
118
The 6 F's - HIA Framework Part 3 (HIA Classic)
How do you know whether or not you "have it all" in your life? One of my goals for you is that you move closer towards your definition of "having it all", and to do that you need to have an objective way of assessing whether you currently have it all. That's where the 6 F's come in! Today's episode is part of a series I did where I breakdown the meaning of "Having It A.L.L." (particularly the A.L.L. acronym). In today's conversation I'm sharing with you the 6 key areas of life that are an integral part of the Having It A.L.L. Framework, the 6 F's: Faith, Family, Friends, Fitness, Finance, and Fun. In the episode you'll hear my definition of each of those areas, how they impact your life, and things you can do to improve or increase any of those 6 areas so that you can get closer to truly "having it all".
32 min
119
The Hero's Journey: A Roadmap To Unlocking Your...
What is the Hero's Journey and how does it apply to your life? In today's episode I'm breaking down the Hero's Journey, walking you through each of the 12 stages, and relating it back to your personal journey as you move from the background player of your story, to the Hero standing front and center! Grab the free PDF that goes along with this episode at www.matthewbivens.com/hero.
77 min
120
Is 2022 Not Turning Out The Way You Thought It ...
As we head towards the midway point of 2022, how are things shaping up? Have you made noticeable progress on achieving your goals, solving your problems or realizing your vision for the year? Or are you facing the tough reality that things haven't changed much since the beginning of the year? In today's bonus episode I'm talking about a huge reason why you might not be seeing the results you wanted by now, and I'm helping you get out of the rut before it's too late.
12 min
121
7 Ways To Be More Bold When You’re Afraid Of Ta...
Does the idea of taking risks scare the mess out of you? I know it did for me, and for much of my life I was completely risk averse. But thankfully I grew to realize that everything I wanted -- a fulfilling career, a deep and loving relationship, healthy and vitality -- all could be mine if I was willing to take the necessary risks, and I started pushing my comfort zones. And the beautiful thing is that it's a learned behavior, something that ANYONE can improve. In today's episode I help you become more bold when you're afraid of taking risks, and I break down simple things you can do and think about that will get you moving in the direction of your abundant loving life.
42 min
122
Toxic People, Negative Noise And Marriage Prep:...
Do you have toxic people in your life? How about in your inner circle? Are there folks in your life who are constantly bringing negativity and noise into your world? And what are the things you should be reviewing and thinking about when preparing for marriage? These are the questions I answer in today's episode of the podcast! The topics today were suggested by YOU and all have to do with OTHERS. Last week I focused on SELF, and today we're focusing on OTHERS (next week is LIFE). I get fiery in this one, so buckle up for some real talk!
67 min
123
What To Do When You're Feeling Stuck! Our Story...
What do you do when you're feeling stuck in life? It's not uncommon to feel stuck at some point in life. It could be in a job that's no longer fulfilling, a relationship that has lost its intimacy, or just a general feeling of going through the motions in life. The reasons for feeling stuck are as varied as you and I, but the solution to getting unstuck is often a few layers deeper than you might be thinking. In today's episode I'm sharing my story of where my wife and I were stuck for 2 years, how we got unstuck, and why the way you are approaching the problem might just be making it worse.
34 min
124
Getting More Out Of Life By Working Smarter, No...
In today's episode I'm sharing with you my tried and tested process for being more productive and feeling more fulfilled, by working smarter and not harder.
44 min
125
Your Personal Growth Depends On 3 Types Of Feed...
Are you open to receiving feedback? Feedback is an integral part of the growth and evolution process. It's one of the most important ingredients to making improvements, progressing towards your goals, and ultimately creating a life where you feel like you "have it all". In today's episode I'm sharing the three types of feedback that exist, and talk about why each one is essential for your own growth and evolution. I also dig into why you keep experiencing the same results over and over in your life.
36 min