<p>r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP's father went through a bitter divorce with his mother. His father actually passed away while he was trying to run away to Canada with his mistress. OP's mom retaliated against her cheating husband by calling him an adulterer on his gravestone. Now OP's family members are pressuring OP to change the headstone. Is the butthole by sticking by his mother's decision?</p>

<p>r/TIFU There's a trend going around to eat the world's spiciest potato chip. It only takes 1 chip to set your mouth on fire. For some reason, OP decides that it's a good idea to eat not one chip, but TWO! As you might expect, he immediately regrets that decision because it feels like a campfire is burning inside of his mouth. He tries to drink water, which just spreads the spicy oils down his throat and across his lips.</p>

<p>r/Idontworkherelady In today's episode, OP gets mistaken as an employee at a retail store because she happens to be wearing clothes from that store. A Karen asks OP where she got her clothes. OP says she doesn't work there, so the Karen becomes enraged and tries to physically rip the clothes off of OP's body! OP managed to clock the Karen in the face during the confrontation, so Karen got way more than she bargained for!</p>

<p>r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP is so pregnant that she could go into labor at any moment. Despite this, her husband insists on hanging out with his buddies every night to watch sports games. OP goes into labor, and her husband refuses to come take her to the hospital because the game isn't over yet. He even lies to her and tells her that he's on the way, when in reality he was just hanging with his friends, watching the game. OP eventually had to call another relative to take her to the hospital.</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance In today's episode, OP has an obnoxious who likes to control people just because he can control people. He rides OP about the office dress code, so OP is happy to maliciously comply by exploiting a loophole in the company dress code that allows him to proudly display his thick chest hair. Careful what you wish for, boss!</p>

<p>r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP takes her one-year-old child to work for a "take your kid to work" day. Her pregnant coworker also shows up. OP's child, being a young kid, looks up the pregnant coworker's dress. The coworker absolutely loses her mind and says that OP's literal baby was mean to &nbsp;her, and that this is how predators are made. Lady, WHAT? He's literally 1-and-a-half years old. He's not attacking you, he's just a curious kid. Are you actually that insane?</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance In today's episode, OP works as a security guard at a large facility. He notices a Karen park her car in a reserved space, and then sneak in through a back door without paying for her ticket! OP doesn't really care about the stolen ticket, but he approaches her to get her to move her car. She assumes that he's there about the stolen ticket, so she quickly shuts OP down. OP just shrugs, walks off, and tows the Karen's car!</p>

<p>r/Choosingbeggars In today's episode, OP gets a disgusting offer from a firefighter. OP's a woman, and the guy claims that he can help her get a firefighter job if she sleeps with him. He writes this long, gross, multi-page text with all the reasons why she should become his friends with benefits, and how he's a "really nice guy" who's also "amazing in bed." Dude, if you're really such a catch, why do you have to blackmail girls into being with you? 🙄</p>

<p>r/Entitledparents In today's episode, OP tells a story from when she was a young girl suffering from a very dangerous type of cancer. She got offered a wish by the Make-a-Wish foundation. She really wanted to go meet her favorite band, but her toxic mother forced her to take the entire family to a tropical vacation instead. OP gave in because she was just a child who wanted to make her mother happy, even though she really wanted to see that band. Wow, imagine stealing a dying child's last wish 🤡🤡🤡</p>

<p>r/Prorevenge In today's episode, OP's bosses try to save some money by forcing all of the employees into doing illegal maintenance around the store. OP refuses to do these highly dangerous tasks, so of course his boss tries to fire him. OP retaliates by reporting the company to government agencies, which immediately shut the company down for dangerous work practices. The freaking CEO of the company comes to fire OP's boss, and beg OP not to press charges!</p>

<p>r/TIFU In today's episode, OP was taking a shower and chose not to wrap a towel around his waste when he was finished. This turned out to be a terrible mistake, because his wife's new kitten is very curious and playful. So when the kitten so a new *dangly toy* attached to OP's waist, the cat pounced! OP felt SEARING PAIN as the kitten attacked a certain body that should definitely never be attacked by kittens. Ouch!</p>

<p>r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP's roommate sneaks into his room and steals a special dish that his girlfriend cooked for him. The dish contains nuts, which OP's roommate is extremely allergic to. When she eats the dish, she has a reaction and has to use an epipen. The roommate flips out on OP and demands that OP pays for her epipen because OP is "responsible" for the dish with nuts. But lady... YOU STOLE THE DISH! That makes you a thief, so why should OP pay you anything?</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance In today's episode, OP has a toxic math teacher who absolutely hates his guts for no reason. So when OP is feeling sick one day during a test, his math teacher assumes that he's faking it and tells him to prove that he' ssick. OP happily obliges, even though he couldn't stop himself even if he wanted to. He barfs all over the classroom floor. This insane teacher then tries to get OP in trouble by claiming that he did it on purpose just to make a scene in class. WTF?</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance In today's episode, OP overperforms at his new job because he's chasing a promotion! During his first yearly review, his boss tells him that they don't give out big promotions for people in their first year, so OP doesn't get a promotion. OP decides that if they're going to pay him a minimum wage salary, then he's going to deliver minimum wage work! He stops doing all of his boss's work, and his boss's life immediately becomes miserable.</p>

<p>r/Choosingbeggars I've just found an incredible job opportunity! This person wants a full-time love slave to clean their house, do their dishes, and drive them around town for free! However, there will be no hanky-panky of ANY kind. So basically this person just wants a full-time live-in slave who does all of their chores for free. Why on earth would anybody sign up for that?</p>

<p>r/Entitledparents In today's episode, OP has an incredibly toxic mother-in-law who tries to insert herself in OP's life at every opportunity. She somehow gets it in her head that OP cheated on her husband, and the baby is a bastard child! One day when OP falls asleep, the mother-in-law kidnaps the baby and sneaks off to a hospital to get a paternity test. The hospital staff panics and gets ready to call the cops because the baby doesn't belong to the mother-in-law.</p>

<p>r/Prorevenge OP is dating a guy who has very fishy behavior. He keeps driving over state lines to buy marijuana so he can drive back into his state and sell it illegally. On one such trip, OP notices that one of her boyfriend's female friends is posting pictures of her snuggled up to her man. She puts the pieces together and discovers that he is a felon with several baby-mamas! In her quest for revenge, OP reports all of her former boyfriend's illegal activities to the government to ensure that his life will be completely destroyed!</p>

<p>r/AmITheA**hole When OP was 10 years old, she came home from school one day to discover that her father had completely abandoned her. He just left! No note, no goodbye, nothing! Luckily, OP's grandmother was able to take care of OP from then on. Many years later, OP inherited her grandmother's house when her grandma passed away. OP's dad showed up for the first time in over a decade to harass OP and demand that she hand over the house. He says that she should be a good daughter 🙄</p>

<p>r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP and her husband engage in an alternative relationship lifestyle. Her husband encourages OP to make a profile on a specialty dating website, but someone from his family finds the profile. All of OP's in-laws confront OP, calling her a cheater for making a profile on this website. OP defends herself by revealing all of her husband's dirty secrets. Is OP the butthole here for telling her husband's family what they do in private?</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance Ever stand behind a Karen at a grocery store? They're always in such a hurry because their life is just SO important! This Karen gets pissy that the grocery store clerk isn't following all of the rules, even though this particular rule is a huge waste off time. The clerk happily complies with Karen and wastes the Karen's time by giving her exactly what she asked for!</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance OP has a blue collar job laying pipe at a large corporation. His white collar boss gets pissed off at OP because OP dared to enter the white collar worker building to retrieve some important blueprints. His boss bans OP from the building forever, which means that none of the workers have the blueprints to lay any of the pipes. The workers have nothing to do for a month, which results in a staggering $2,000,000 in wasted labor costs.</p>

<p>r/Choosingbeggars This young lady is looking for a sperm donor! Are you the lucky guy? All you have to do is pay her the low price of about $180,000 over 18 years! It's the deal of the century! This woman wants you to knock her up, but also pay child support throughout the child's entire life. Oh, and did I mention that you will have NO parental rights? Why on earth would anybody take her up on this insane offer?</p>

<p>r/Entitledparents In today's episode, OP discovers that his own mother secretly stole the dog that he had as a child, and then sold it to a man in the next town over. Later in life, OP happens to cross paths with the man, who graciously gives the dog back to OP after OP proves that he owned the dog. OP's mother was shocked when she realized that her crime had been discovered!</p>

<p>r/TIFU In today's episode, OP experiences what can only be described as a date from hell. He hooks up with a girl, and in the middle of the night she starts acting really weird. He kicks her out, and she collapses in the hallway of his apartment complex. He then drags her lifeless body to the front desk to get help. The paramedics arrived, and she was clinically dead for a few minutes! Luckily they were able to revive her, and then the girl asked OP for a second date.</p>

<p>r/Maliciouscompliance OP works at a grocery store that's on a military base. One day, a woman comes in and tries to pay off her store credit. OP's computer says that the customer is deceased, so he informs the woman that she is dead. The woman is understandably confused, but is excited when she realizes that dead people don't have to pay off debts! She makes a new account and OP starts calling her "zombie!'</p>